tom shillue
Comedy • Writing • Television
Do you know comedian Tom Shillue? (the Gutfeld guy) This is kind of his private club, for the public. Come on in and hang out.
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October 07, 2022

We are ensconced now in NW WA, at My Big Brother’s (MBB) house.

Since my ‘Loretta Lynn’ story went over so well. I thought I’d post this one…

The day I met John Paul II

I get my chops busted for saying I met the Pope…
OK, so I didn’t shake his hand and say “How the hell are ya your Pontiff?”

We arrived a little late that day to the Pentagon. The CINC and I made the 40 mile commute up I95 everyday. It could take an hour, or three…
I missed roll call so I didn’t hear who the big wig was that was arriving. All I knew is I had to rush down to the 4th corridor entrance, ‘The Heliport’ for an ‘Arrival’.

When anyone semi-important arrives at the Pentagon, they get a reception. From only an undersecretary to a full blown Honor Guard with band.
Usually we did the receptions at the ‘River Entrance’. That side of the building had a nice grass lawn area, was across from LBJ Grove park, and a marina. So I was curious as to why, if this was someone important why were they coming in The Heliport entrance?

During these ceremonies I was prominent, I was in my 20s and impressive. I always stood to the front left of the honor guard. Then when entering the building, I stood with my back to the right side of the entrance as the person walked in.
It was my job to impress upon them that they were entering ‘The Pentagon’.

There wasn’t a ceremony, curious, Heliport entrance, how important could this guy be?

There were two sets of doors at the entrances, on each side of a spacious vestibule. I took up a position to the right (my left) of the open double doors.
I was partially blocking the first two or so feet of that side of the entrance.

The outside doors boomed open as a car pulled up.
The Heliport entrance (prior to 9/11) had an asphalt road parallel to the building from South Parking, almost to the doors. So if a car pulled up, there would only be 2-3 feet to the building.
There was a gaggle of people milling around the entrance. Then I saw my Capt. Opening the car door..
Whoa… I’ve never seen him at one of these things!!!

More confusion, the SecDef was also there…
What the hell did I miss?!?!

Then they began entering the building. My Captain came in and stood to the right, inside the door way (from my position).
The SecDef walked in and to his right there was a short man in all white. Immediately next to him was a man dressed in red Cardinal’s robes.
As they got closer, I realized it was the Pope, John Paul II.
Holy crap!
Excuse the expression..

As they neared the entrance where I was, it was obvious that they weren’t going to fit through the door three across (SecDef, Pope, and Cardinal).
Especially with my big ass blocking the door.
I guess the Cardinal may have been an important man. He was probably used to getting his way with a look.
He gave me the look so I would move…
Nope, the SecDef didn’t ask, ain’t going to happen.
They stopped for a second, the Pope looked at me and smiled.
I just nodded back, and they continued on.
The Cardinal was pissed!!!

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“The Chief”

This is a work of fiction, based on actual events.

The old gentleman opened the door to his cabin, he was feeling every bit of his 80 years. He’d spent most of that time riding the range.
He took a seat in an old chair on his porch, his daughter was coming by with her grandkids directly.
He saw her about once a week, when she came by to check on him.
She usually spent the first 10-15 minutes, haranguing him about moving to her place, she had electric and water put in in ‘36, he “was too old be going out to an outhouse in the dark”.
“I take a lantern.”
“That’s another thing, those kerosene lamps are dangerous, especially in this old tinderbox!”

Yes sir, she’s her mamas daughter…
Maybe she’ll be a little nicer this time he thought, because her grandkids will be with her.

He looked off to the east, he knew he would see the dust cloud and hear that infernal contraption of Mr. Ford. 20 ‘Horsepower’ it had.
Only a horse can provide horsepower! He’d owned enough horses in his day to know. Why wasn’t it ‘Mulepower’? Dang contraption reminded him ...

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